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08-Jan-2018 21:53

''Women do themselves a disfavour by offering to split the cheque,'' she warns. Sex triggers a bonding hormone called oxytocin, she says, and this can play havoc with the female psyche. She is, she says, prepared to use "tough love" when the situation calls for it.

''If you have sex before you've become intimate, you put yourself in a very vulnerable position." "The biggest mistake women make," Paula adds, "is in thinking men are like women. A recent client was "fat with corky hair", for example.

In a recent Woman's Hour programme on first date etiquette, spaghetti, oysters and lobster were just some of the foods described as deal breakers.

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But if you won’t go outside your comfort zone, I can pretty much assure you that nothing’s going to change.Current clients – all female – include parole officers, psychotherapists and investment bankers (age range 30-70), who seek her advice on everything from how to spice up their internet profile to how to behave on a first date.