Dating an overly jealous person
In the midst of a separation, especially if many other people want that relationship to keep going, he may be overwhelmed with indecision and unable to see clearly what is best.Prior Infidelities Men who have had relationships with other women throughout their committed relationship have either had partners who have regularly left and returned, or have been successful in keeping them clandestine.Here are some of the cues you need to be aware of: Prior History Volatile, unstable relationships that have had a history of break-ups and re-connections are often laden with unresolved issues.Intimate partners, who can’t live with each other and can’t live without each other, often take agreed-upon breaks from the relationship from time to time, either with or without other partners while they are separated.Over time, and especially if they’ve been in disappointing other relationships, they miss each other again and valiantly try to “make it work.” If they don’t see those patterns and correct them, that process will occur until they either wear each other out or find someone they’d rather invest in.Committed partners who still care deeply for one another, on the other hand, often separate because of external stress, worn-out interactions, infidelities, or a slow drift-apart that neither realized could have ended up in a separation.A partner who may have understood a one-night stand that is immediately confessed is less likely to feel as humiliated as one who finds out much later or when a relationship is more established.
These attachments can bring people back together after a separation in ways that new relationships are less likely to do. If one or both partners in a relationship have drifted too far apart to repair the loss, that separated man may be soured against getting involved long-term again or authentically seeking a new long-term relationship.This is one of the most common dilemmas my patients have brought to me over the past four decades.Though there are multiple variations on the theme, there is one way in which they all are similar: two women are in a competitive triangle with the same man.Many people considering divorce are in the throes of conflict and don’t want another source of trouble adding to what is already a difficult situation.
That is especially true if the new relationship can threaten the other partner’s potential access to resources or loss of what they have.If the separated man isn’t sure about reconnecting with his partner and a new relationship would make that option far less likely, he may not want to lose those choices so chooses to keep his options open by separating those two worlds.